Signs from those lost

I'm Catholic, but not a practicing one per se. I believe in God and all that, mostly because to think that there's nothing else past life is quite depressing.

For those of you who read my blog, you know that my Dad passed over a year and a half ago. It's been rough. But since he's been gone, I've experienced things that are way more than coincidences.

Potential opening to a book I'm writing

I've been told I should write a book about how I've used social media and writing to cope with the loss of my father at the age of 56. He was gone too soon and unexpectedly. It rocked our family to the core and is still fresh a year and a half later. Here's what I have written so far...

Messages to Dad: The Working Title, "In My Life"

I've been told by a few folks that the stuff I've been writing you should be compiled and put into a book. At first, I wasn't sure. I thought most of the stuff was personal, despite being shared publicly. 

I've been writing to you hereTweeting and managing the Facebook page as a way to cope with losing you unexpectedly. It's helped. A lot.

Messages to Dad: Got Through Christmas OK

Hey pops, we got through Christmas, our first without you. It was pretty rough, but all in all, we had each other to get us through it. 

We talked about you a lot, shared a ton of stories, raised a few glasses in your honor and shed some tears. 

Surprisingly enough, it wasn't as bad as I thought it was. We had each other to talk to, lean on and hug. 

Guess that's all we can do. It might get easier as the years go on, but from what I'm told by others that have lost loved-ones, it doesn't. It doesn't get worse either. It just continues to be different. 

So I guess we'll keep plugging along; keeping the memories alive and enjoy the moments we had with you as well as enjoying the moments we will have with each other in the years to come.

Here's to hoping that 2013 is by far, a much better year.   

 

Messages to Dad: Fish On!

 Hey pops, reeled in a couple of stripers yesterday and talked to Uncle Louie before we set off for the day. Thought of you the entire time I was out there. "Fish on"...was the saying of the day. 



I remember when you'd wake Michael and I up to go to Concord to pluck some large mouth of the pond. We'd hit Pemberton Fruit Market for a couple large subs; filled the cooler with drinks (and beers for you); hit Roaches for some fresh bait; and, load up the car and hit the road pre-dawn style.


Messages to Dad: Father's Day

Hey dad, been a while. I hope you are well wherever you are. It's been nearly four months since you passed and it's not getting any easier. In fact, with each day, the pain is pretty unbearable at times. The loss is equal to a thousand yard, gaping hole in the earth caused by an unexpected meteor.

We celebrated your birthday. We had a First Communion. We had preschool graduation. We've celebrated some many things since you've passed and with each occasion, there was a sense of loss that was heavy on everyone's hearts.

Well, tomorrow is Father's Day. It's the first without you and to be brutally honest, it fucking sucks. Sorry for the crass words, but there's really no other way to describe it.

Messages to Dad: Kayla's First Communion

Hey dad, tomorrow if going to be a bitter sweet day. Kayla makes her First Communion and everyone in the family will be there. It'll be nice to see everyone again and get us all together, but yet again, we'll be reminded of the big loss that's been left with your passing away.

It's been over two months and it still feels like it was yesterday that we were at the hospital, game planning with the doctors about how to get your back on your feet and better. We had no idea that those were the last moments we'd spend with you. 

It's been so hard. There are a slew of moments throughout the day that you creep into my mind. It's nice to be able to call Uncle Louie, play my guitar, listen to Beatles songs, watch you playing guitar on video or look at pictures to keep those memories fresh in my mind. 

Tomorrow, while Kayla receives her First Communion, you'll be with her…closer to her than any one of us.